9 things covert narcissists say to poison your mind

If someone close to you has ever left you feeling emotionally exhausted, manipulated, and torn apart by their words and actions, you may be interacting with a covert narcissist. Imagine having a normal conversation with someone who initially seems compassionate and understanding but who leaves you feeling confused and emotionally drained as you spend more time with them. This individual is a covert narcissist skilled at playing with other people’s emotions to leave them feeling bewildered and worn out. The mental torture caused by things covert narcissists say is really significant, as their tactics of manipulation and subversion can elicit feelings of confusion, distress, and emotional fatigue. A covert narcissist can be characterized as an individual displaying narcissistic traits, however subtly and concealed, than an overt narcissist.

This article will examine the mental torture caused by the things covert narcissists say and illuminate its influence on the victim’s psychological well-being.

1.   “I was merely joking; can’t you handle a joke?”

This is one of the many things covert narcissists say to minimize the impact of their spiteful comments and gaslight their victims. They mock their victim instead of addressing the toxicity of their insults, denigrating statements, and passive-aggressive behavior. The narcissist may then convince the victim to doubt their feelings and perspectives to avoid taking accountability for their detrimental actions.

The covert narcissist may use humor to keep the victim off guard and under control. If the victim attempts to explain why they feel wounded or uncomfortable in response to these “jokes,” the narcissist may accuse them of being excessively sensitive or lacking a sense of humor. This causes the victim to doubt their own emotions, leaving them bewildered and unimportant.

2.   “Nobody else could adore you as much as I do”

Covert narcissists utilize this tactic to make their victims feel fearful and insecure. The narcissist aims to make the victim dependent on them by undermining their self-esteem so they will never find someone who treats them better. By manipulating the victim’s emotions, narcissists can convince them that they owe the narcissist credit for remaining in the relationship, regardless of how detrimental it is to their own mental health. This is a prevalent tactic among the things covert narcissists say.

When they are the victim’s sole source of affection and support, the narcissist gains enormous control over their sentiments and decisions. This tactic is intended to make the victim feel confined and reliant on the narcissist, so they will never want to quit the unhealthy relationship.

3.   “You are merely attempting to create drama”

This is one of the “things covert narcissists say” to deflect blame and avoid accountability when the victim tries to address legitimate problems or disputes within the relationship. The narcissist attempts to shift attention away from their own acts by accusing the victim of creating unnecessary drama. This tactic puts the victim’s emotions and experiences into doubt, even though they are reasonable and justified. The covert narcissist is a master manipulator who can always depict themselves favourably. By making the victim doubt their own observations and emotions, the narcissist may prevent them from addressing their destructive behaviour.

4.   “You are fortunate that I tolerate your flaws.”

This is one of the iconic things covert narcissists say. The covert narcissist uses “tolerating flaws” as a manipulative strategy to induce feelings of loyalty and reliance on the target. The narcissist elevates himself to a selfless saviour while mocking the victim’s perceived faults by characterizing their “tolerance” as an act of kindness. Despite the victim’s emotional maltreatment at the hands of the narcissist, the victim’s emotions are manipulated into believing they should consider themselves fortunate to have the narcissist in their lives.

The victim’s mind is tortured by the narcissist’s repeated reminders that the victim is insufficient and requires the narcissist’s “tolerance.” They may question their worth and fear they cannot endure without the narcissist’s approval and presence. This psychological torture may cause the victim to doubt themselves and comply with the narcissist’s every demand to avoid rejection or criticism.

5.   “You are so paranoid and insecure”

Covert narcissists frequently exploit the anxieties and uncertainties of their victims. By claiming their victim is “paranoid and insecure,” narcissists further attack their victim’s confidence and self-esteem.This is a common thing covert narcissists say to cast doubt on the integrity of their victims’ feelings and ideas to control them. The victim may begin to question their emotions and ideas and their ability to perceive the world accurately. As a consequence of this manipulation, the victim is more likely to believe the narcissist’s interpretation of events, thereby increasing the narcissist’s influence.

Constantly questioning the victim’s rationality and causing them to feel trapped in a never-ending cycle of confusion and self-blame is a form of mental torture. This form of mental abuse may provoke feelings of helplessness, melancholy, and anxiety.

6.   “I cannot stay with such a needy person.”

Covert narcissists manipulate and control others by exploiting their victims’ feelings of loneliness and isolation. When narcissists designate their victims as “needy,” they may transfer responsibility and make them feel guilty for desiring assistance, affection, or attention. The victim feels incapable of affection and attention, causing them to hide their genuine emotions.

Things covert narcissists say are often meant to keep their victims feeling anxious and dependent.This strategy induces emotional distress in two ways. Due to being conditioned to suppress their emotional needs, the first effect is that the victim develops an inner conflict and a sense of emptiness. Second, they may internalize the belief that they are flawed or unlovable because they are too dependent, which may cause them to avoid romantic relationships or detach from them.

7.   “I’m the reason for your success”

This is the most common thing covert narcissists say to the victim. The covert narcissist may feel threatened by the victim’s success or significant accomplishments, especially if they get a lot of attention and praise. Narcissists frequently diminish their victims’ abilities and attribute their accomplishments to their own guidance to reinforce their sense of superiority and power.

This strategy is a form of mental torment because it employs gaslighting to cause the victim to mistrust their own abilities and contributions to success. By taking credit for their victims’ achievements, narcissists make their victims feel dependent on them for approval and support. Consequently, the victim may feel emotionally confined and responsible to the narcissist, which can perpetuate a toxic relationship of power that places the victim under the narcissist’s control.

8.   “You’re just too emotional and Overreacting”

Things covert narcissists say frequently include this statement.  Narcissists use this statement against their victims when they protest against their behaviors by claiming that they are “too emotional” or “overreacting.”   By doing so, the narcissist effectively makes the target feel responsible for any negative emotions resulting from the abusive relationship. This can trap the victim in a vicious cycle of mental distress where their own thoughts and emotions torture them. The victim may learn to repress their emotions, thereby facilitating the narcissist’s ability to exert power as they are afraid of the name-calling of narcissists.

9.   “Be thankful for what I’ve done for you”

This is one of the many things covert narcissists say to control and manage their victims by making them feel like they should be thankful for what the narcissists have done for them. They may act as if they are helping the victim by doing pleasant things for them, but their true intent is to manipulate and control them. The covert narcissist ensures that the victim feels indebted by repeatedly reminding them of what they have done, making it difficult for the victim to get out of the toxic relationship problems.

If you’re interacting with a covert narcissist, they may attempt to persuade you that you owe them something for their generosity or that they were instrumental to your success. Narcissists make it more difficult for their victims to stand up to them and pursue autonomy by exploiting their victims’ feelings of remorse and obligation.

Final Thoughts

The mental torture induced by the things covert narcissists say can have long-lasting effects on the victim’s mental health. It is crucial to be aware of and able to spot these misleading things to prevent relationships that might end up being harmful to you. The process of recovering from the traumas caused by covert narcissists and regaining a sense of control can be aided by reaching out for assistance from loved ones.

If you sense that you are in a relationship with a covert narcissist or any other kind of toxic individual, you should think about getting the help of a mental health expert. They will guide you through the difficulties of this situation and help you establish healthy coping skills. In these situations, it is crucial to remember the importance of setting boundaries and prioritizing mental health. Finally, if you want to learn more about covert narcissists and the weird things they do to create havoc. Then ,you can explore other articles on our website by clicking here .